Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
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Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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