What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
