Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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