I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...