"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
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she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
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I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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