is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
