I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize