I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
