He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
