I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Who died my cat blue again?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.