I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
