Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize