Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize