D3 body, D1 cock
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
