This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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