and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
