yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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