I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize