is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
