I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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