the condom got lost in my hair
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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