Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
