some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
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