How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
