wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
