we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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