Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
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