He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize