Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
