my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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