This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
dude i'm inner monologue high
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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