i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
