On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
