As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I think we might need a safe word for this...
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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