My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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