The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Randomize