he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
