Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize