last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
