Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize