i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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