I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Randomize
