i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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