But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
