I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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