If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize