Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize