you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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