dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
