i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
